So Begins the Next 50-some Years of the Rest of My Life


In case you were wondering why I fell off the face of the earth the past month or so…let me tell you how I spent my last few days. I got depressed again, I yelled at myself for being an idiot in baking class, I pondered heavily about my future and the fact that I was born to be broke, I dressed up like a Parisienne girl for Halloween, I played Pokémon X nonstop for the longest time, and I revised my debut novel 10 times before finally pressing “publish” on Smashwords.com.

Yes, I am technically an author now.

 

So, this idea makes me think… This moment is setting me up or the rest of my life. I’m not just me now. I’m not that silly girl who thinks she’s famous even though no one has any idea that I even write. I actually have a book out that people can read and like and share and vote for! I never dreamed this moment would actually come; I longed for it for the past three years. But…now it’s scary. Because now I can’t go back.

If I suddenly am blessed with “popularity” then I’ll have to write and finish all my other million books to the tune of “why aren’t you done yet?!” Or, if no one cares 9which won’t surprise me), then I’ll just relapse into my little turtle shell while mulling through life trying to find a job or trying to scrounge enough money to open a bakery.

Or, even worse, it will be somewhere inbetween. Where I’ll be doing everything at the same time! Bachelors degree in English plus scrounging money for bakery plus writing novels number 2&3 plus begging some rich people to let me borrow money so I can go to France sometime before I die.

Sigh. So, here it is. The first part of the rest of my life. I wonder where this silly book will get me. It’s almost ironic that Subtle, Flowing Changes could bring about either no change or ridiculously insane changes.

What’ll it be, CB?

 

 

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